dreams...

have you ever woken up from a dream with this feeling of understanding how things must be? realizing how mistaken you`ve been with the way you thought things were acceptable to be?

I had that dream last night. I can`t recall the details. I know I was with some people that were supposed to be friends or at least acquaintances from work. We were having fun doing some outdoor activities. We ended up meeting another group of people.. in the middle of the dream, someone came up to my mind.

At that moment I saw myself staring at my phone; waiting for a message that would never come. Then, I looked to this group of people and I was having so much fun with them, and it just felt right. Just like that, it was like a veil was removed from my eyes and I understood how wrong I was settling for what I`ve been given.

That feeling I had during that dream, is something I do not want to forget.

I must stop begging for the little to no attention I have come so used to get and to stop finding excuses for every time I was ignored. I don`t think they are bad people, I must just stop expecting anything from people who time after time keep showing how little they care for me.

No matter what I do, I will never be enough. I have to understand they want to feel loved, they long to feel wanted... they just don`t want to feel that from me.

It is now the time to not only understand it but to truly accept it.